Bringing Happiness

Resuming an incomplete thought….

“I guess my deeper question is, first, are gay communities deeply unhappy?  What causes happiness?  Are there fundamental, universal laws that dictate when happiness can be felt?”

I believe happiness is not based on words or definitions, it is based on actions—that there are universal laws that govern the things that bring us joy.  When I think of the things that bring me joy, my family and my relationship with heaven are paramount in my life.  I cannot imagine a life separated from the comfort and stability these forces bring to me.  When tragedy struck our family a year and a half ago, life laid me flat with a blow I never saw coming.  All I had was tried, and those two aspects of my life, heaven and family, became pillars that supported me.  They were strong and solid.  They kept my knees from buckling under until I could catch my breath and learn how to begin again.  Every one of us on this earth will go through the knockdown that I went through in one form or another.  It happens to all of us.  I don’t know the answers, but I do know that self pity, unchecked, scars the soul.   Selfless service, given with all your heart, is healing balm.  That is one truth I learned.  The other is that prayer brings relief.  Heaven brings the replenishing sun again when all you see is darkness and your flame is drawn and slight.

The gold of that excruciating experience is in the strength found from those principles. There is a part of the human soul that searches for truth and meaning.  There are universal truths.  The search is life’s challenge, and truth it’s treasure.

“What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly. Heaven knows how to put a proper price upon its goods…”  –Thomas Paine



  1. sherrieh said,

    October 12, 2008 at 9:31 am

    As human beings we all are given the same emotions. Gay communities are no different from other communities in that regard. Some choose to be happy and others choose to be the polar opposite. I have a gay cousin and quite a few gay friends. They choose to be happy most of the time.

    Honey, happiness is truly a choice. We choose how we see the situation. Do we lament about it or look for the good in it? Truly it is often only when we are faced with severe trials and tribulations in our lives that we find out at the fundamental gut level who in our family we can rely on, who among our friends can we rely on. Most important to me, is how deep is our faith. People will let us down. God, Creator, or higher power, by whatever name we call her/him, is always there for us.

    Often happiness and joy comes with finding pleasure in the simple things in life. I’ll be writing about that later today in my blog at You have inspired me to write about that as a Universal Truth. Angel blessing sto you!

  2. beetlebabee said,

    October 12, 2008 at 11:45 pm

    “Gay communities are no different from other communities in that regard. Some choose to be happy and others choose to be the polar opposite. I have a gay cousin and quite a few gay friends. They choose to be happy most of the time.”

    I think this is true. Why then is there so much waiting, pining, and even anger at society? Why is happiness put off by these groups? Why the widespread argument that changing the definition will finally bring the ever elusive happiness? Human nature? Culture of victimism? Always looking for something and never feeling satisfied with what you’ve got? Guilt?

    Kind of wrapped up in this is another question I have, Why does the gay community identify so strongly with the sexual persuasion aspect of themselves? I have never marched in a parade celebrating my sexual preference. I wonder if the tendency to identify overmuch with this one aspect of their characters magnifies the unhappiness factor.

    If happiness is purely chosen, then everyone should be happy.

  3. sherrieh said,

    October 13, 2008 at 1:12 pm

    I can’t answer for people who are gay. But I can answer part of your questions since I worked much of my professional life with Special Needs teens who are so different from other kids in the school. They were so focussed on how they were different that they seldom looked at how they were the same as others. I believe for many of the gay teens I have worked with, as well as the gay people I know, they hid themselves and who they fundamentally are for so much of their lives. It is quite normal to get excited when you are part of a group who accepts you as you are. Hence, the Gay Pride parades. Most gay adults whom I know and who are in established relationships are the same as any other couple and do not engage in flaunting their sexual preference. For many it is a relief that family and friends accept them just as they are. I suspect that the ones who flaunt are so unhappy with what they have had to endure that they virtually thumb their collective noses at the society that won’t allow them to simply be themselves.

    In my family I helped one of my cousins come out of the closet after 40 years of being very unhappy. He even lived in another country far away from his family so they wouldn’t find out because he feared their condemnation. Once he came out, and once our family collectively accepted him, he and his partner returned to our country and are very happily married. How sad that he had to live 40 years of his life in hiding.

    I’m very grateful to the 14 year old teen who taught me what he had been through with his family from the age of 6 when he knew he was different and more female than male. That young man helped turn me from a homophobic to a human being who sincerely cared about other human beings. I was his principal and his counselor. However, I’m sure I learned far more from him than he ever learned from me. God gives us the gift of those people in our paths to enrich our lives and to open our hearts to how we are alike as humans. Blessings to you!

  4. Woman on the Street said,

    November 13, 2008 at 5:02 pm

    These are all excellent points. I’m glad that I found this blog!

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